GETTING OUT OF THE DRAMA TRIANGLE

Drawing with a triangle and 3 different persons that share a thinking to explain the drama triangle

“A classic relational scenario in business, the Drama Triangle updates the psychological game set up in a conflictual relationship”

A Persecutor who attacks a potential victim, a Savior who rescues the poor victim and a Victim who feels persecuted and so the game begins, with a starting role for each player.

Unconsciously, we all know how the game will go and we play it regularly because somehow, we benefit from it.

Each of the players has expectations, or needs, that they think they can achieve through this game. For Karpman, the Drama Triangle is a way of getting unconscious needs met. For the Victim, the need to attract attention, to be taken care of. For the Savior, the need to be useful and for the Persecutor the need to control.

But the game always ends badly and everyone comes out feeling bitter from this endless cycle.

So how do you remove yourself from – or even better, never join –  this endless triangle game?

Questions from the coach

  • What is my favorite gateway to these games?

 

For the Persecutor:

  • Why is it important for me to control the situation?
  • What would happen if I let go?

 

For the Savior:

  • Why is it important for me to save others?
  • What would happen if I didn’t?

 

For the Victim:

  • What do I need?
  • How can I make that happen?
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